Skiing in France: A blanc canvas

"Your knees and ankles must be bent, like a monkey, 'OoOoAhAh!'" our instructor, Denis, explains to the kids.

Animal analogies aside, slicing through icing sugar snow at Val d'Isere is like being in a French film: everyone is stylish, except the Australian family dressed in their daggies. From the top of the famed Face de Bellevarde, a black run used for the men's downhill in the 1992 Winter Olympics, the village is made of dolls' houses below.

Despite the 26,000 on-mountain beds, the atmosphere is intimate, especially inside the faux fur-furnished Hotel Tsanteleina (of course, it's only cosy inside, as our nine-year-old discovers after doing a nudie run along our balcony).

This is family five-star, with separate living areas, plasma TVs, a hammam, sauna, jacuzzi, and kids' bathrobes.

Half-board includes breakfast and dinner, with a children's buffet full of favourites such as spaghetti bolognese, but we opt for Savoie specialties at L'Arolay, a traditional brasserie in the neighbouring town, Le Fornet.

After a failed attempt at schoolgirl French, ordering a bottle of red wine instead of a glass (not a bad problem, really) we start with a salad before cooking thin slices of beef a la minuta on a tabletop barbecue.

Aside from gourmet grazing and sensational skiing, there's ice climbing (like rock climbing but slippery), speed skiing (kite surfing on the snow), and snow driving (in BMWs on a special track). If the weather's inclement, kids can take the free shuttle to the Sports Centre, with its heated swimming pool and mushroom fountain.

At Les Menuires, in The Three Valleys, a couple of hours' drive from Val d'Isere, you can shop in one of the many supermarkets to cook dinner in your apartment.

"Accommodation in France used to be 'rabbit cages', to squeeze in as many people as possible," says Annette Duvillard, who manages the four-star Le Chalet du Mont Vallon Spa Resort. "Now, modern hotels are much bigger. It's good for Aussies, who like their space."

Walking into Mont Vallon we feel right at home, with a fire burning in the expansive foyer, and apartments that sleep six.

On the first day, we opt for a private lesson with a gorgeous instructor (did I mention he's gorgeous?) before touring the Piou Piou kids' clubs in the two central hubs, La Croisette and Les Bruyeres. The nursery takes children from three to 18 months; the children's garden for slalom training up to six years; and ski school for the older ones. The highlight is the BK Fun Zone at the top of the Becca chairlift. Simply swipe your ski pass at the top, perform a dramatic jump, swipe it again at the end, and your video is played back on a plasma screen. It's free and the link is sent for you to download on social media. For his 15 seconds of fame, Taj flails his arms around like a wind-up toy, while his middle-aged mum screams, "I've got air! I've got air!" (Sadly, the evidence reveals a snow-borne Driving Miss Daisy ... )

We break for lunch at Le Corbeleys, a log cabin-style cafe near the picturesque village of Saint-Martin-de-Belleville.

I try the house special, croziflette, tiny pasta mixed with Reblochon cheese, cream and cured ham, while hubby has his daily dose of foie gras, which you can't get in Australia (did I hear someone say nanny state?).

The food is fresh and filling, washed down with a dash of genepy, a spirit made from mountain flowers. There's nothing quite like rocket fuel to have you whizzing down the slopes.

For dinner, we go to a farm for some paddock-to-plate. You enter La Ferme Choumette through the shed downstairs, to a symphony of moo-ing, baa-ing and oink-ing, before dining upstairs on home-made Tomme de Savoie cheese, veal and navarin of lamb.

Drive 1½ hours north and you're in the chocolate-box town of Megeve. Horse-drawn carriages clop along cobblestone streets, past historic shops, modern sculptures and colourful light displays. Megeve was the first place in the world to use a gondola to send skiers up the mountain; 80 years later you still catch one from the central square to Mont d'Arbois, where the wide pistes are ideal for kids.

Our instructor, Patrigeon, takes Taj in between her legs to guide him down a steep stretch. Suddenly, his confidence soars: within hours we're racing each other to the bottom.

We stay in the centre of town in the new five-star Le M de Megeve, where the funky fit-out features mock reindeer antlers protruding from the ceiling. The loft rooms are small, but luxurious, with en suites on both levels. In the restaurant, the menu is designed as an invitation to an opening night, with healthy salmon and vegetables for the kids. Down the road, at the quirky Le Torrent, we sit inside a chicken coop to devour the delicious truffled fondue.

This is good fuel for our next activity - dog sledding. "Are they dogs, or wolves?" Taj asks, nervously eyeing the 47 Alaskan malamutes and Siberian huskies.

First the musher, Bruno Cornali, teaches hubby how to drive a rudimentary sled: "Now, don't brake too hard, because it might break the dogs' backs."

As Jason takes off, Taj, Grace and I climb into another sled, pulled by eight of the barking beasts. It appears there's no first gear: We go from zero to hero, bouncing over bumps, to Taj's delight and Grace's horror. Afterwards, we hop on a horse-drawn carriage to visit a farm where they produce lait for fromage. Sadly, my French fails me again.

"Ooh, je voir les viande!" I exclaim, inspecting the 45 cows. "Non!" the farmer, Emmanuelle, exclaims, shaking her head. "Les vache. These are not steaks."

The kids marvel at the mountain of poo - I mean - fertiliser, next to the shed. "You see this side, Mont Blanc," Emmanuelle says, pointing to the view. "And this side, Mont Noir!"

We finish our trip 100 kilometres north of Megeve at Val Thorens, which was named world's best ski resort last year.

At 2300 metres there's reliably good snow cover, even in late May. Val Thorens is renowned for its innovation, with Wi-Fi on all pistes and the longest tobogganing track in the country. The easiest runs are walking distance from your accommodation (including some free ones with "t-bones", as Grace calls them - also known as T-bars).

Le Hameau du Kashmir hotel is especially convenient, with a ski hire shop, coin-operated laundry, parking, pool and creche on-site. The two-bedroom apartments are perfect for large families, while Le Karmin restaurant serves delicious Kashmiri cuisine as well as local faves.

Skiing in France isn't as expensive as you may think: our strong dollar means lift tickets, food, and accommodation are about the same price as back home and there's an abundance of ski-in/ski-out accommodation.

You too could be impersonating a French film star on the slopes of Val d'Isere.

Viva la difference.

The writer travelled as a guest of France Montagnes.

TRIP NOTES

GETTING THERE

The child-friendly Singapore Airlines operates regular flights from Sydney and Melbourne to Zurich, with a stop in Singapore. From Zurich, take a domestic connection with Swiss Air Lines to Geneva. From there, hire a car, catch a train, take a bus to any of the resorts. See singaporeair.com.

STAYING THERE

Val d'Isere: Le Tsanteleina Resort & Spa starts from $3895 for seven nights in a family room with a village view, see tsanteleina.com.

Le Chalet du Mont Vallon starts from $2478 for a two-bedroom apartment sleeping five people; $1538 for a one-bedroom apartment sleeping four, see hotel-montvallon-menuires.com.

Megeve: M de Megeve, starts from $6232 for a junior suite for two adults and two children, see mdemegeve.com.

Le Hameau du Kashmir: A self-contained family suite costs $6295, see le-hameau-du-kashmir.com.

MORE INFORMATION

france-montagnes.com

FIVE MORE TIPS FOR FAMILY SKIING IN FRANCE

1. Inexperienced skiers can find it best to go in the European spring, with more daylight hours.

2. Book accommodation from Sunday or Monday; the traffic jams from Geneva on Saturdays are hellish.

3. To get you going, most resorts offer free use of snow carpet or T-bar lifts on their beginner slopes. Some also have free lift passes for under-sixes.

4. Each village we visited has a sports centre with gym, heated pool, bouncing castles and foam play areas.

5. Take your ski equipment with you; check luggage policies, but many airlines won't charge extra. Ski hire in France can be expensive.